Tackle Your Tuesday 

If you believe, you can achieve ✨   
 me and my brother entertain ourselves way too easily 😂
But on a more serious note, give yourselves a daily reminder: no goal is too big, no dreams are too far out of reach. Be strong in your efforts and courageous to take on slightly intimidating goals. You’ll be surprised what you can accomplish.

  

   

Song of the Week: “Lean on Me”–Bill Withers

 

If there is a load
You have to bear that you can’t carry
I’m right up the road, I’ll share your load
If you just call me

This song of the week is for all of the people who have stood next to me in this health journey of mine. For the people who said without hesitation “lean on me,” “I’m here for you,” “how can I help?” For the people who have helped me carry the load when I’m too weak to carry it alone.For the people who ask how my doctor visits are going (if they’re not there themselves), who check in to see how I’m feeling that week and if I’ve made any progress. For the people who will read this and know without a doubt that they’re the ones I’m talking about. The ones who whether they’re sitting beside me, or sitting miles away in another state, are there when I need someone.

This song is also for all of the people like me,  on my side of the journey. The ones who have felt troubled, pained, sorrowed, and frustrated (aka every single one of you.) For the ones who have needed someone to lean on. For the people who too often let their pride get in the way of asking for help. To the fighters.

 

World Cancer Day

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 My dad and his mother, my Grandma Joan, some odd years ago. 

This is a picture of family. Of happiness. Of strong Italian looks. Of love. Of a fighter.
My grandma Joan’s love for life and all of its treasures was evident to me even at my young age of 7 or 8. I remember her vibrant jewelry, unique yet classic sense of fashion, her soothing voice, her “I need seconds immediately” spinach lasagna, and her warm smile.

What I don’t remember though, was her showing any signs of weakness or illness when she was around me. What I don’t remember was at any time seeing my Grandma Joan surrender to her cancer.

I was too young to truly know what was going on at the time. If my parents told me about it, I don’t remember. Chances are I was in my head somewhere, daydreaming as children so often do at that age. Even as I was taken to visit her in the hospital, I remember clearly that I had no idea why she was sick. I didn’t know what cancer meant or what it did. I just couldn’t figure out what had happened.
My Grandma Joan lost her battle to colon cancer before I got the chance to really get to know her and learn from her. Before I got to be of age where I could learn how to make her famous meatballs and sauce, from the great chef herself. Before I was old enough to retain stories she had about acting, dancing, and meeting all the eccentric and interesting people I’m sure she met. I know I listened to her– as children listen to their elders–because I’ll tell ya, even as tiny as she was, people knew not to mess with her. (I like to think that part of my gumption and strong backbone is due to her) But I was never old enough to truly listen to her. I missed out on stories I’m sure she would’ve told me about my dad’s childhood and her childhood as well. Stories that I would be able to share as I got older.

Now, I’d like to say that my Grandma Joan is the only person in my family who has been affected by cancer. I’d like to say that none of my friends have lost a grandparent or relative due to cancer, like I have.

Sadly, I can’t say those things.

You see, cancer isn’t like other evils. It doesn’t discriminate by age, gender, race, etc. It doesn’t care if you’re ready for it or not. 


However, cancer doesn’t know that people who face it, are the toughest people out there.

Some win their battles, thankfully. But some like my grandma, do not.

The fact is, no one should ever have to face that battle in the first place. No one should ever have to be put to that test.


I pray that cancer stops striking down on people. I hope that all people battling cancer are able to say that they defeated the beast. But mostly, I pray that one day in my lifetime I see a cure for an evil that is all too prevalent in this world.

 

What’s the Word: Generate

  
To cause to arise or come about.

Any spoonie knows that a lot of the journey involves waiting around for a diagnosis, test results, treatments, answers, and seeing if treatments are even working. Sometimes (too often) doctors can’t figure us out. 

We wait around for positive things to happen in a world where we run into so many road blocks.

Sometimes, though, it’s up to us to take control of our own journey. Be the captain of your own ship, as they say. 

We need to generate positivity in our lives. If we wait around for the positive things to happen to us, they rarely will. 

This is your journey–you’ll be amazed what you can do with it when you put your back into it. 

Monday Mantra 

  
Trying to adopt this and implement it in all aspects of my life today, next week, and beyond. 

Fear is inevitable (for most people. Superman, Morgan freeman, and Chuck Norris excluded, obvs). There’s nothing wrong with feeling fear. It doesn’t make you weak or inferior. It makes you human. Don’t let people tell you to not be afraid. Frankly, because no one else besides you knows what you’re up against.

However, don’t let that fear take over your life. Instead, let it fuel your fire and push you toward learning how to strike that fear from your life.

Don’t let fear hault your progress. Don’t let fear make you stop in your tracks, because what’s life if not a journey? Fear is just a small part of it. 

Even Big League Pain Meds Won’t Help This Hall of Famer 

It’s been a full week since this  pounding, throbbing, pulsating, evil like migraine has started. 

With no end in sight, I went to the ER for acute treatment to at least get rid of it for a while.

After 4, yes 4 tries to get an IV in me, I was administered the big pain killers. 

Sidebar: I’m sorry but even if I don’t have the greatest of veins, it shouldn’t take 4 very painful tries to get an IV. Also don’t ask me “are you usually difficult when it comes to IVs?” Lady, even when I’ve been very dehydrated, people have gotten my vein on their first try. This is the second time at this same hospital that they have take 4 times to get a vein. And mind you, they hit the wrong place a couple times cuz it was much more painful than normal.

Ok sorry, to continue:

I was hopeful that at least this would get rid of my migraine until tomorrow.

Well, I felt relief for all of an hour. And then dude hammering away in my brain started hammering away again.

The pounds. The thuds. The beating. 

It all is back. 

So now what? What’s a girl to do now? 

I’m trying very hard to trust in God’s path for me. Trying very hard to keep the faith strong when the entirety of me is weakened to a pulp.

My fear is an ocean and my worries are a swarm of gnats in the summer heat.  

  
Will try to sleep now and pray that tomorrow brings new hope, new relief, (and once science gets there, a new brain 😁) 

In high need of good thoughts, prayers, advice, hugs, and puppy cuddles. 

I accept any or all of the above 

💛

Song of the Week: “Slow it Down” by The Lumineers 

Song of the Week: “Slow It Down” by @thelumineers 
This song stops me in my tracks every time it plays. I’ve used it as a pillow to lay my head down on during times when I’ve felt defeated, overwhelmed, and discouraged. 
One of my favorite lines of any song is in this song:

And when she stood, she stood tall

It takes a lot to stand up every time you get knocked down–especially when you’re getting knocked down over and over again. And sometimes you just can’t stand up after every knockout. But I tell you this, when you do stand up to all the struggles life’s been throwing you, people will notice and stare in awe.

This song comforts me in a blanket of understanding when I don’t have the strength to stand, but encourages me to gather the courage to do so. Maybe it can do the same for you. 💙

Do any of you feel a similar connection to this song? Or have a song that makes you feel a similar way?

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