Vulnerability and Authenticity with Chronic Illness

What makes you vulnerable makes you beautiful…there’s a word for it: authentic

Vulnerability is a scary thing. We don’t want to look weak. We don’t want people to pity us or judge us. We know we can’t be perfect, but we don’t want to seem too imperfect. So often, we think our imperfections are our flaws. However, we shouldn’t confuse the two or make them interchangeable. Because our imperfections are what make us unique.

When you have a chronic illness, you experience a whole lot of vulnerability. Your parents become your at home nurses, your friends have to run errands for you because you can’t physically get out of bed, your partner sees you cry out of pain and frustration or curled up in the fetal position because any other position is too painful. These are all vulnerabilities that we can hide from the outside world, though.

It’s one thing to be vulnerable with the people who care about you and love you – it’s a totally new ballgame when you show your vulnerability to strangers!

But, spoiler alert – you are human. Every single person you pass on the street is self-conscious about something. Every single person has an imperfection (or lets be real, imperfections). But not everybody shares theirs  and because of that, someone else who may have a similar imperfection feels alone or isolated because they think they’re the only ones like them. They may end up confusing imperfections with flaws and look upon their own imperfections with a negative mindset.

I know it’s hard to share our stories and our vulnerabilities because we think whoever we’re sharing them with may judge us. As humans, we sometimes judge another person or their situation simply because we are unfamiliar with or can’t relate to them or their situation. But, that’s not fair, is it?

I can raise my hand and say that I am still working on sharing my story and my health journey with not only strangers, but sometimes friends, because I’m worried they’ll look at me funny, or think I’m strange or think I’m over exaggerating my pain & symptoms. So, most of the time, I turn to writing because it’s personal and I don’t have to show it to anyone else.

writing in DC

But recently, I’ve been trying to really open up to my own vulnerabilities and show all aspects of my journey without hesitation or reservations. And I urge you to do the same.

Share your journey with others. Give the world a window into the unique person you are. No one else shares your story, but I promise you that someone else can relate to your story. By being vulnerable and showing that vulnerability to the outside world, you could be helping someone else just like you. And, honestly, you’ll end up helping yourself most of all.

Falling Like the Rest of Us

Falling is an accident. Staying down is a choice.

Sometimes it feels like we are constantly falling. You know that feeling you get in your stomach on a roller coaster drop? Or the feeling when you trip and fall on your face in front of a bunch of people? Or when you somehow fall UP the stairs?

When your health continues to knock you down over and over again, that feeling becomes overwhelmingly normal and strong. We can convince ourselves that we’re the only ones falling this much, because no one else has the same or as many or as debilitating health problems as we have.

We look around and see that everyone else is on their feet, heads held high just emitting “I have my life together” kind of vibes.

But in reality, every single one of those people you see and pass by every day has fallen at one point. More than once. Whether it’s due to health challenges, relationship problems, family issues, job losses, etc. It has happened to everyone.

Some of those people are standing again because they made the choice to not stay down. If they can make that choice, so can you. Yes, some people get knocked down and tripped up more than others. But it happens to all of us. No matter how many times we fall, we have to make the choice to stand back up.

And make sure to do what you can to help the people around stand back up. They may need your help just like you may need theirs. They could be falling in the same moment you are. Grab each others hands and pull each other back up.

Aerial yoga, falling